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Noah flashed his knight emblem. “Jon Doe, knight of Uther and husband of a lying whore. That son of a bitch, Noah, bedded my wife and left her pregnant, so if you think you’re going to rob me of the pleasure of stringing that rat bastard up by the balls, know that you’ll end up dangling right next to him.”

Noah then put several illusory bullets in her chest, making her stagger as she was struck with mortal terror, thinking her organs had been pierced. To her credit, she managed to stay on her feet, but Noah swooped in before she could reform her stance. He tossed his sword into the air, grabbed it by the blade, and smacked her upside the head with the handle.

As quietly as she could she made her way up to the bedside and slowly sat on the bed as it took her weight. Once she was sure her dad was still deep in his sleep, she wriggled under the sheet until she was next him. As usual he was arranged like a star fish with his arms and legs out to either side. To accommodate him she curled into a ball and put herself right by his side with his arm under her head like a pillow. Like most dads she’d heard about hers slept naked, but although all the other girls who mentioned this seemed grossed out, she didn’t mind. To be fair a lot of the of the other girl’s dads weren’t as handsome as hers, or in as good shape. A few years ago, she had to put up with a few friends who couldn’t stop gushing about her dad when they came over and saw him for the first time. Although she saw all the good features about him, to her he was always just her dad. How could she think about him that way?