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Maybe you and I do deserve to suffer for our wrongdoing. If that’s so, then it means that when things get painful, when things get difficult, we don’t have the luxury of quitting. We don’t get to end our lives to escape what we did. Whatever form the pain takes, we bear it, we endure it, we welcome it, all while we try to make this world a place where people like us, like how we used to be, have no place, and the people who would be hurt can instead live in peace. The next time you encounter an obstacle you cannot overcome, when you just want to curl up into a ball and quit on the world, remind yourself that you don’t deserve the peace of surrender. You have to keep working, to keep fighting, to keep suffering, until the day when you’ve fully repented.

“No?” She asked, clearly surprised. “Okay sweetie, I won't, if that's what you want. But do you mind if I ask why? We could not tell him about you and Brucie, if you're afraid how he would react... though I'm sure he'd get over it quickly, once he saw how hot you are, doing it! But you have to know he wouldn't have a problem with you and Daddy, not after everything he's been doing to me all these years! Even if you don't want to do anything with him yourself, I know how much he would love getting to watch, if you'd let him.”

“Oh, God...” she moaned, but tied down the way she was there wasn't anything she could do about it.