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A moment of silence passed before Tarnas cleared his throat and began to speak. “That truly is an unforgivable crime. You are right to feel guilty, to hate yourself for the things you’ve done. That is what you are supposed to feel, and to admit it now means you are on the correct path. It means you are learning from your mistakes and want to do right. Whether or not you can ever truly make up for what you have done, you can still become a better man than you were before. You can become a man who helps instead of hurts, who strives to make the world a better place.”

Alexis sighed. “I’ve lost fights before, plenty of times, as you can imagine. But Bella, that was something else. I failed, Noah. I failed to protect the Knight’s Sheath, my comrades, the king. I was knocked aside by a monster that defies the laws of nature. No matter how much I train, how much I struggle, what good is it when someone like Bella, who never fought a day in her life, can suddenly become an unholy demigod and crush us like we’re insects? How is that fair? Part of me did want to take part in the tournament, to show everyone, including myself, how strong I am. But… I was afraid I would instead be reminded of how weak I am.”

He had never told her what he and Alexis spoke of that snowy morning, never told her the real reason why he had helped her break free of Galvin. If he did, how would she react? Would she become disheartened, accusing him of toying with her for his own selfish desires because he couldn’t let go of the past? Or would she go with it, try to take up the role of his long-departed wife, forsaking her identity, her future, and her relationship with Alexis just to receive his affection? Neither was an outcome he wanted.